Venting Time

My purpose in blogging is for free therapy. It feels great to get my thoughts out there and if I have one person reading about my issues than I feel like I accomplished something. Today I had a dentist appointment. I must have told 15 people working there the reason I haven't been their since June and the reason why I didn't want to get XRays today, nobody listens. If I had to talk about my M/C one more time I was going to punch somebody. Look at my d*mn chart, its in there!! And since I'm on the topic of people I want to punch I've made you an easy reference list below:
1. BFF- She's getting married next November and I'm here MOH. She acts like she is the only one that has ever gotten married and everyone's life revolves around her and her wedding. She asked me a few weeks back if I would hold off on getting PG so I can go on her bachelorette party and basically won't ruin her wedding- I know a total Queen B*. We got in a huge fight about it. Every time I think about her, the wedding, having to order my bridesmaid dress a year in advance because she doesn't want them to get discontinued or how she bugs me to send out an email to the bridal party to 'start saving' for her bachelorette party it makes my blood boil. I'm irate just thinking about it right now. I just want to scream in her face BACK OFF. I don't know what my situation is going to be in November, maybe I'll be PG maybe I would have already had the baby but I don't want to think about things so far in advance, just let me worry about the here and now. I feel like I have this unnecessary stress because I have to make everything perfect for her and when I do find out my good news that she'll try to rain on my parade and give me the evil eye. I already lost one baby, I don't want to have to ever go through that again. I'm at the point where I don't really care if I'm even in her wedding, her selfishness has really gotten under my skin. I have had the conversation with her and she still doesn't get it, Bridezilla in full effect. My latest coping mechanism with her is for little or no phone contact, I recently realized I'm not a phone person. Oh, and one more thing. She and her fiance were at my house for dinner two weeks ago and she goes to tell me that an old friend from college is PG, actually she said she was huge. What the f* would you need to tell me this when you know, I'm still sensitive and I should be like 6 months PG right now. Ugh, I really can't stand her sometimes. Oh, and one more thing- really one last thing because I could probably go on all night, the bachelorette party. Not for nothing but I doubt I'm going. I mean I will plan the whole thing out, don't get me wrong, a sick party weekend in Vegas but if I'm even a week PG next August, I'm not going. I'm not going to risk M/Cing to make her happy. No f*ing way. She has a big problem with this and like I said to her, I can't predict where I'll be next August and next November so don't make me make plans now. I'm not emailing grown women to start saving when they know that she wants a weekend away in Vegas. They should know and if they don't they obviously they weren't being serious that they wanted to come. 2 girls from her bridal party are getting married right before her (June and October) and me and 1 other girl are trying to get PG out of the 6 she has. Everyone has a life and they are not stopping for her stupid wedding!!!
2. Clients- I'm so sick of demanding rude clients. I can't deal. I'm nice to a point but don't push me. I'm really getting sick of them wanting me to work for free. Do this and that and then not pay or pay late. One complains she isn't selling enough and if she doesn't sell than she can't afford to keep me on- well ramp up your f*ing sales force. Another annoys me with her attitude, speaking to me like I'm her assistant- excuse me lady, if you're going to have that tone than call me when you calm down and the last is a big sissy- she has to get her office manager to call me because she's scared of me. What the hell is wrong with people! I feel like I'm getting soft in my old age. I used to work in the city and was basically like a bat out of hell. Now, suburbia has changed me a bit. I need to enroll in a class to revive my inner Queen B*
3. Sister- I get a call this morning from my sissy that lives across the country, shes crying because she doesn't feel good. So I asked her if she could driver herself to the doctor or an emergency room. No she tells me because she collapsed in the kitchen before she called me. So I told her to call 911 and get an ambulance to pick her up. She's scared she tells me, of what?! I thought you were dying, why are you calling me and my parents when you live in a different time zone? Its not like I can hop in my car and come help you! So I just called her now to check up on her and she's still sleeping. The girl is always sick. If its not bad headaches then its UTIs and if its not that then its severe sore throats. What the hell is wrong with you?! Go to a damn doctor and get yourself checked out and stop moving across the country away from your family and friends- we can't take care of you from here.

I think that's it. Well, I'm sure I can go on about something or another. Like how my Dad annoyed me this weekend when I called to tell him Happy Birthday or how my Painter didn't show up today or how my other BFF calls me at the most inconvenient times, almost as though she is doing it on purpose. I am to remain calm, cool and collected. I am due to O any day now or it happened yesterday. DH and I are still BDing ED, tomorrow starts EOD. Praying this is my cycle so I can order my damn bridesmaid dress already either in a size 0 or 10. Haven't decided yet. xo